Pirates of the Caribbean, Dead Man's Chest

I remember several years ago, sitting in a theater. It was dark and the previews had started. And then I heard it: Yo-ho-ho-and a bottle of rum... Pirates of the Caribbean was just coming out, and Depp was to star as CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow. A few months later, the film came out, and it was a smash hit. Everyone loves it. And who couldn't? Knightly was busting out of her top most of the time anyway. Love for this film came from pirates, and Knightly.

And then, a few months ago, I again was in the theater, and I heard it again: Yo-ho-ho- and a bottle of rum! Pirates 2 was soon to hit theaters.

So Saturday, I head to the theaters, to see "Dead Man's Chest," not having heard anything yet, and wondering what this tale would be. Would it be like the first? Would the acting be solid? Would the story carry my attention? Would it just be a carbon copy?

And in the end, I was let down on all sides.

What...happened?

It is my opinion that the creators of the first installment of Pirates saw how overly successful this film was, and decided to make another one. Of course, we all knew they'd make another one, but we all also thought that there would be something more than a few scribbling on napkins, in terms of script development.

DMC takes us through a journey to find the Flying Dutchman, and Davey Jones: The task: to find his heart. Why, one might ask? Why, to save Knightly from prison.

Oh course, not 20 minutes into prison, she escapes, and joins up with the familiar cast from the first film.

I think what got to me most about this film, was the unnecessarily long segments. The crew find themselves on an island of cannibals, and for the remaining 2 hours of the film, audiences wonder why there were there in the first place. I can't figure it out. Films tend to suffer when they are filled with filler that exists only to fill.

This fill, also, seems to be hit with slapstick! Most of the comedy in this film comes from falling, tumbling, or landing in some sort of comical manner. The first installment of PotC relied on witty language, and acting: the movements of Jack Sparrow, and the language. People were discovering things about each other, fighting for something. DMC seems to exist just because it can. And when a film does that, I quickly lose my attention.

Of course, it did set records for opening day. But does that not press further the idea that the film was made because they knew it would be successful? Bloom, I feel awkward to say, had a much better acting role in the first film (with exception to a single moment: it's a spoiler, so I'll refrain.) Knightly also seemed to exist because she's hot. Breasts pressed tightly together in her outfits, she seemed to have less speaking roles than Silent Bob in all Kevin Smith movies put together.

And then there's Depp, championing the role of CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow. I've no problem with him continuing the role. He is, for a lack of better words, and diverse acting genius. I say this simply because, in comparison of all his roles, he plays very diverse characters, and does it well. In this film, he brings back Sparrow perfectly. Too much, I might add. His lines in this film were merely a play off of his original lines in PotC. Comical comments about metro-sexuals, and an attempt to be witty with logical loopholes in dialogue. It's what his character was designed to be. I just feel it was too much, and not original enough for the sequel to distinguish it from the first.

Well, there's my huge review of this film. I left the theater upset, and not looking forward to the third. Of course, I have to go see it, simply because I've seen the first two. As for a recommendation: that's tough. If you loved the first one, you might feel bad after the second one. If you're not expecting a lot, get a large drink, large popcorn, and 4 boxes of candy. That'll help you through the 2+ hours of squid fights, and prancing.

Sorry Depp, I love your skills, and abilities. This simply just didn't challenge you, and in tern, didn't challenge me. 4.5 of 10